A wise person once said, “Without communication there is no relationship.” In the dawn of our relationships, we tend to talk for hours about anything, everything, and absolutely nothing all at once. Those open lines may last through the engagement, wedding, and newlywed phases of life; but, as the routine and demands of every day responsibility take over, talking takes a back seat. Yet, stagnant lines of communication can put our marriage in a precarious place. Reconnect with your spouse by saying these four things daily.
I love you
You may think you’ve got this one down already. Back up a moment. I’m not talking about a perfunctory “Love you” as you walk out the door or before you hang up the phone. I mean a sincere, heart-felt, “Have I told you that I love you more today than I did yesterday?” type of ‘I love you.’ Every day you get up and you make the choice to love your spouse. Make sure you tell them in a meaningful way – more than a simple, habit-driven afterthought.
I’m proud of you/I admire you
Do you smile when you see the way your child and spouse interact? Do you admire the way your spouse juggles work and family? Take a moment to tell them – every day.
I appreciate you
When we’re in the daily grind, juggling work, home, family, and all those other things we pile on our plates, it’s easy to take our partners for granted. Don’t. As soon as you finish reading this, go find your spouse and say thank you. Make sure you note specific things for which you’re grateful: “I enjoyed the dinner you made. I appreciate that you took the time to make us a healthy meal after a long day.”
I need you
The Bible, from Genesis and through the books of the New Testament, teaches us that marriage is about interdependence. Whether it’s the image of two becoming one found in Genesis, Matthew and Mark, or Ecclesiastes’ insight as to why ‘two are better than one,’ the Bible is clear that life within marriage is a team sport.
Challenge: Grease those lines of communication. Make talking to your spouse a priority today. Don’t stop with the four statements above. What else will you share?